it’s always like this

May 1, 2009

omitting swears here

Filed under: a wedding story, family ties, gimme a break, just shoot me — notsojenny @ 9:20 am

just when i thought i was done cursing for the week my family has once again made me blow steam out my ears!  i don’t know what it is about this stuff but my sister can really make my blood boil.

i appreciate all the hard work my sister and S are putting into my shower.  i really do.  they didn’t have to throw me one  and i know that, so i’m extremely appreciative that they are.  and i know they throw parties like i throw parties and it’s going to be very themey and tied together and they won’t forget a single detail.  it’s going to be wonderful.

and in the beginning i wondered how they would do this, would it even be worth it?  because they and some of my girlfriends are in CT.  me and more of my girlfriends and M’s family are down here.  i figured if they had it up in CT it wouldn’t be too bad, we’d somehow get M’s family up there and it would be my mom, sis, S, and CT friends.  then i thought maybe they would do it down here because only my couple of girlfriends from CT would then not be able to make it but everyone else could.  then they told me what they were doing…

it’s in MD.  this may not make sense to anyone but here’s why – my entire family is from MD, both sides of the fam, the same town, within a matter of blocks.  plus it’s about half way between here and CT.  makes sense, right?  so then i asked my sister what she was putting on the invites, did she need the husband names?  she got very snippy with me and told me it was for GIRLS ONLY.  um, okay, that’s great, but no one is travelling to MD for an overnight trip (which it would have to be because of the distance) alone.  at least a few people would probably go if they saw the option of bringing their hubby and sending him off to do guy stuff with M and my brother in law, S’s husband, etc. 

so then M and i decided to try to arrange a dinner for our families while they’re all in one place, this will be the first time.  and i told my sister this and she got snippy with me, it was something along the lines of “fine, but you have to let me know what you’re planning because i want to plan my time out there too.  there are things i want to do.”  which would have been an acceptable response SANS ATTITUDE!  WTF!?

so then today M talked to his sister (who lives in MD, only about 2hrs from where the shower will be) and she said she wasn’t planning on bringing her hubs or the boys because the invite explicitly said GIRLS ONLY.  since they sent me a separate invitation for the shower i don’t get to see what the invites look like that went out to the guest list.  and apparently they make it clear that boys are not allowed.   

i’m trying to spread the word virally that the guys will be doing something that day so any hubs would be welcome to join in!  plus we’ll be going to Ocean City the following day (weather permitting).   it’s the truth but i’m really hoping that sweetens the pot too.

i just don’t get why she’s being so stingy about this thing.  i get that it’s not a jack-n-jill, that’s cool.  the guys don’t have to attend the shower itself but i know if i was going to put all the effort in, that they’re putting into this, i’d want it to be for as many people as possible.

and i’m not being bratty because i want it to be a bigger party, i’m really not.  i just want to celebrate as much as possible during this short time before the wedding with the people that matter.  and while everyone who can go definitely matters (hell, it’s just family so of course they matter) our wedding is so small that pretty much everyone we invited is very important to us.

even typing this makes me heated.  i know my sister has this picture in her head of what it’s going to be but i don’t think she’s considering the fact that NO ONE ELSE has any reason to want to go to this podunk town in MD.  we’re biased because we grew up visiting there… i don’t think she’s thinking straight.

at first i thought this was a lovely idea because having it in one state would alienate my friends in the other state… but on second though it might alienate my friends in BOTH states.

on top of this a group of friends here is throwing us an engagement party… the weekend before the shower.  they were trying to make it very shower-esque but i got them to tone it down a little.  so in hindsight the shower should be in CT.  at least more people could go and we’d get M’s family up there, it would be more difficult but it would happen and it would be much easier for my sister and S.

all in all, i’m still looking forward to my shower but i am kinda irritated about my sister’s attitude with the guests… i guess it’s just not how i would handle it if i had the option i’d schedule all of this stuff myself… i love event planning!

~ today i learned… ancient Egyptian priests plucked EVERY hair from their bodies, including their eyebrows and eyelashes ~

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1 Comment »

  1. Augh! That’s sooo frustrating. I have no idea how my MOH is planning my shower, or where, but I’m leaving it totally up to her. Practically no one involved in my wedding lives in the same city so everyone’s going to have to travel in some form. Sorry your sister is being so snippy about all of this though–no good!

    Comment by stealthnerd — May 1, 2009 @ 1:56 pm


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