it’s always like this

December 3, 2008

word assoc.

Filed under: family ties — notsojenny @ 10:21 am

what do the following words have in common?

ridiculous, silly, absurd, bat-shit, crazy, nuts, just fuckin nuts, out of her mind, insane, delusional

not sure?  they’re all words my sister and i have used to describe my mom in the past week.  this is not a post i’d planned for today but the woman drove me crazy last night.  if i lived withing arm’s reach of her i’d have violently shaken her. 

i know alot of people have to deal with their mothers trying to run their wedding as if it’s their own.  i just wasn’t that worried about it for me.  my mom has always had an attitude of “she’s gonna do whatever she wants anyway” when it comes to me.  with my sister she knows she can play mind control but with me, i’ve always been a little too stubborn.  so i figured when it came to my wedding plans/ideas she’d still feel the need to give her opinion but she’d also expect that i would only take it if i felt the same. 

so anyway i left her a message the other day asking her to call me with her list of dates that she’d like us to avoid.  she’s mentioned before about how certain times are bad for her because of work so i wanted to take this into account.  she finally called me back last night (2 days later of course) and proceeded to tell me “i can not go to anything on…” and then rattled off a list of 5 weekends in 3 months.  WHAT?  first of all, i explained to her that i can’t guarantee we won’t have one of these dates but we’d try to avoid them.  to which she informed me “well if you use those dates i can’t go”.  really?  no kidding?  you can’t request time off 6 months out to attend your daughter’s wedding?  that sounds like a problem.  i’m not sure how to give you the short version of this but when it comes to work she has no clue of her rights.  she doesn’t believe that she’s allotted a certain number of vacation days and can take them whenever she wants with the right amount of advance notice.  she honestly believes (and we had this conversation again last night) that if she takes time off during one of these big events they will not only bring someone in to cover for her but that they’ll give that person her job.  the woman is insane.  we have this whole “you have rights” conversation with her all the time but she just refuses to believe it.  she’s really any employer’s dream because all they do is walk all over her and she takes it because she thinks she has to. 

anyway, that set me off.  i didn’t flip out on her but i immediately called my sister and we had a bitch fest for about 2hrs.  i know my mom has opinions, i’m prepared for that.  i can deal with those.  what i can’t deal with is her stubbornness in not wanting to ever take what’s rightfully hers.

okay, i’m going to end this one right now and start composing the post i’d decided i would write when i got out of work yesterday… stay tuned



  1. oh my. that…wow. That sucks :/

    what dates are you guys looking at anyhow??? :)

    Comment by Heidi — December 3, 2008 @ 2:15 pm

  2. Girl, I feel your pain. We originally were going to get married on May 25th of this year. We had told my in-laws 3 or 4 times about the date during the early part of our engagement (we were engaged for two years), but it was like they weren’t taking it seriously that we were getting married (they are so crazy, don’t let me get started). Then last February (of 2007) they were visiting us and I was talking about sending in the deposit for our reception site, when his father told us if we got married on that day he might not make it, and if he did he would only be able to be there for the actual wedding, not the entire weekend. He works at a stone quarry and they have a stone sale every year on Memorial Day weekend and he had to be there. UMMM WHAT?!? We told them we wanted this date for months and they never mentioned this?? So we had to change the date to July 5th, and since we got married in NC, could not have the wedding outside, as originally planned, because NC is a hot box in the summer and it rains every day for about in hour in the late afternoon. Thank goodness we ended up having it indoors, because like clock work, it stormed for about 40 minutes RIGHT before our ceremony. Ugh, they annoy me soooo much it’s not even funny.

    Okay I totally didn’t mean to write a book. Bottom line…even though I was mad at the time and thinking about how we changed it (on principle) still makes me angry, I know my husband would have been so devastated if we got married and his dad wasn’t there for our wedding weekend, so deep down I know it’s okay and not the end of the world :)

    Comment by Jackie — December 3, 2008 @ 5:26 pm

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