it’s always like this

February 1, 2008

confessions

Filed under: perfect strangers, wonder years — notsojenny @ 2:11 pm
  • i don’t wash my hair every day.  sometimes i don’t even shower every day, and i don’t have a problem with that
  • i bought driving mocs just because i wanted some, but now i really see their purpose and i love them.  it’s saving my shoes
  • i’m a serious drama queen – i usually feel like the drama follows me, but sometimes i know i bring it on myself
  • i find myself trying to guilt trip M sometimes… and i hate myself for it
  • i’m so stubborn that even when i realize i’m wrong about something i’m too set in my ways to admit it.  i admit it the next day.
  • my body does what it wants.  it doesn’t matter what the pills i take tell it to do.
  • i’m a bitch when i’m hungry.  i’ll bite your head off.  but don’t ever expect me to admit that when i’m hungry.
  • i’m actually just a bitch more often that i’d like.  not sure why, but i know i wish i wasn’t.
  • i pick up other people’s mannerisms.  if i hang out with people often i’ll catch myself laughing the way they do, or saying things they say.  it’s completely subconscious.  it’s like i’m a chameleon.
  • i have a hard time with my decision to leave college.  i’m a very successful person because i’ve worked my butt off in jobs.  but i still don’t like to admit that i did something so unconventional as not finish college… even though it was my choice, part of me feels like a failure
  • i always, always go with my gut.  if i question anything, i take it as a sign that it’s not right
  • i laugh and giggle through every bikini wax… i have no clue why
  • i fix my eyebrows after i leave the salon.  my estetician has no idea, but she always does them lopsided.  i’m just afraid to hurt her feelings if i tell her or go somewhere else
  • i can’t sleep after watching something too intense, i’m like a 5 year old
  • sometimes i’m too lazy to eat. and it makes me feel guilty.
  • i’m obsessed with weddings.  wedding shows.  other people’s weddings.  wedding planning.  i search sites and watch every wedding show out there.  i don’t know if it’s because i think mine is coming and i want to be prepared, or if i’m just afraid that i’ll never have one so i revel in every one else’s.
  • i’m nervous about my pilates class today
  • i’m also really excited about it because i keep daydreaming about how solid my body will be some day soon
  • i feel like the big decisions in my future will force me to choose between S, who’s been my best friend forever and is like family- she’s been there for me through everything, and my sister.  she’s my sister, we have a different bond and she’s the only sister i have.  but i feel like any future wedding and children will force me to choose.
  • i love being a girl.  it upsets me when i encounter girls who hate dresses, skirts, make-up, whatever. being girly doesn’t have to equal high maintenance.  i wish more girls got that.
  • i will not share my 10year goals with M because i’m embarrassed that one of them was “find someone who loves you”
  • i watch movies about love because it makes me feel like anything is possible, i watch movies that make me cry because i like to connect to something and it reminds me that life is hard
  • part of me thinks the hangovers i get are my mind & body’s way of keeping me away from the genetics i have that would cause me to be dependant on anything
  • i sometimes think i’m too independant and wish i relied on other people, but i’m afriad of being viewed as weak
  • i heart rules.  i love them.  i really do. 
  • i don’t like people who bitch about my country.  at least appreciate the irony in that you’re allowed to talk shit about a country that gives you that freedom.  but seriously, if you don’t like it you’re free to leave.  that’s the beauty of this place.
  • i don’t ever tell people i work with my age.  i’m afraid they’ll treat me differently if they know how young i am

  

  

~ today i learned… that the Eisenhower interstate system requires that one mile in every five must be straight. These straight sections are usable as airstrips in times of war or other emergencies ~

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1 Comment »

  1. Whoa…really? About the whole interstate thing. That’s awesome! :)

    I also pick up mannerisms and I think it pisses people off :)

    Comment by littlespoon — February 1, 2008 @ 3:16 pm


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