lookin good kiddo

every girl had some guy on their wall as a kid, right?  it was probably whoever you cut out of Bop or Tiger Beat.  or, if you were lucky, you got the edition with the pull-out poster in the middle!  for me i was lucky to have my dreamy beau hunk KC plastered above my bed.  you know who i’m talking about.  the illustrious Mike Seaver.  that ol’ smooth faced cutie pie, Kirk Cameron. 

i recently saw him doing press for his new book and i was delighted to see that he has only aged a year in the past 20.  holy cow is he still super super cute!  he reminds me of tom hanks in this way (though i am in no way attracted to tom, i just think he never ages either).  for those of you who haven’t seen him, this is what the little devil looks like now…

cute, right?  although he’s never done any noteworthy or amazing work, kirk’s really done a great job keeping up his looks.  he married his onscreen sweetheart, chelsea noble.  isn’t that cute too?  and the man has 6 kids.  SIX KIDS!  he’s only 37!  it may not seem like alot to some of you but when i think about M having 6 kids by now, my eyes cross.  i can’t even imagine having that many kids… ever.  for me 2 would be nice.  still cheap enough to afford because i don’t think i could do just one.  i couldn’t even have one dog, i had to go buy him a friend.  we’ll see though.  i have a few steps to get across before any of this is an issue though.

back to kirk.  i hope that if i ever have boys they can retain their looks like this.  heck, i hope M retains his looks.  granted he doesn’t look 14 anymore but he doesn’t look his age either.  and i met him just after his father died so i’m not sure what he looked like.  now that i think of it, i’ve never even seen a picture of his father.  M doesn’t have any pictures in his house.  he has one of his nephews and that’s it.  seriosuly, one photo in a frame.  it’s odd.  maybe i should go buy him some frames?  we have a ton of pictures of us and i should probably force one upon his home.  maybe.
okay, so i guess that wasn’t back to kirk really, but i had nothing else to say about him.  except that while i spent many days of my youth daydreaming about being his girlfriend (i always dreamed it to be something like that episode where they put on “our town”) i never thought about him moving on with his life without me… but it appears he did.  and somehow he’s made it work without me in it.  good for you kirk.

  

  

~ today i learned… rapper Ice Cube’s real name is O’Shea Jackson ~

i just know

my friend DS thinks i’m crazy.  one of his exes even called me a few nasty names when he told her i felt this way once.  of course in my defense i never liked this girl and didn’t try hard to pretend to so it didn’t take much to make her call me names.  anyhoo…

i think i can tell what type of kisser a guy is by looking at him.  you may think that sounds crazy too.  and while it does have a little to do with their personality it’s mostly about their physical features and the way they speak (not the words but the way they move their mouth).  i am completely convinced that i know this.  i’m sure it’s partly because i’ve kissed alot of boys, more than i’d like to admit, but there tend to be commonalities between certain things/people that i can break down to a physical appearance level. 

this being said, i hate making the call of good kisser/bad kisser.  i think it’s all relative.  if you’ve kissed more than one person (which i hope to heaven all of you have… if not, go out NOW and kiss someone new) then you too know that people can kiss so differently.  some people apparently like to have their face soaked and others like to be poked in the mouth with a tongue.  i know this not only from making the mistake of kissing some of these people, but also from watching total strangers make out in these ways.   that’s why i don’t think i’ve ever once claimed that someone was a “bad kisser”.  i can only say that they weren’t good for me because i believe that there’s someone else out there that is looking to be kissed that way and they might be perfect together.  having kissed alot of boys i realize that there’s so many different ways of kissing and even the same basic elements of kissing can be done so completely different.  for me, guys with thin or tight lips don’t work.  it’s just not good for me.  it may have something to do with me having full lips.  i dunno.  all i know is they’re not for me.  and as insane as i know i sound saying that all guys with thin lips can’t kiss me right, i’ve yet to be proven wrong. 

i believe the time DS mentioned this to his female friend was when it was in the context of sex and male body parts.  because, yes, i believe that i can tell that too.  again, i feel that certain body types lend to specific male body part sizes.  and when i say this i mean that just by looking at someone’s physical build (not what they’ve done to their body, but their natural shape) i can tell you pretty well the estimations of their male member.  DS even poo-pooed me on this one.  but i’ve been able to call them all pretty well in the past, so i stick to my original statement.  i honestly believe i can tell. 

so as i’ve been watching bachelorette this season, i’ve come to the conclusion that she may feel the same.  i’ve noticed that she hasn’t really kissed any of the guys with the thin lips. 

plenty of people will say “notsojenny, we now have proof that you’re insane.  you can not tell that by looking at someone”.  but i stick to my opinion.  i can’t explain it in words but if you want to walk down the street with me i’ll tell you about each guy we pass and then you can kiss them and ask them to drop trou and confirm my statements or prove me wrong.  let me know when you’d like to test out this theory.

   

  

~ today i learned… sound travels about 4x faster in water than in air ~

straighten up

so i had my free consultation for invisalign

umm, yah.  i want it.  NOW!  apparently everything is included in the cost.  while it’s not the cheapest thing ever it makes a big difference that the vists aren’t extra.  the changes aren’t extra.  it’s like a big kit.  it’s pretty damn cool.

when i first got to my dentists office i had to fill out a new form.  i came to the area that said “how many times do you brush your teeth a day?”  i put 2.  i thought about it for a second and realized most people probably put 3, right?  and that if i were being completely honest i should probably put 1.5 since on nights when i’m exhausted i say F it and go to bed without brushing or washing my face.  gross?  maybe.  but it feels like the right decision at the time.  next was the box asking “how many times a week do you floss?”  i put 1.  i sat there staring at it, laughing and wondering if i should change it.  maybe add a line on top and make it a 7?  7 sounds better, right?  then i realized that once a week was even a lie so i just left it.  they eventually called me in to the office and i was surprised when i didn’t get a lecture about my brushing and flossing habits.  so we talked about invisalign.

once they gave me the cost and explained the way the payments can be arranged i started doing the math in my head.  if i do this now it’s going to be a stretch.  especially since the day you do the molds you have to put $600 cash down that can’t be split into payments.  that part makes me nervous.  i can make payments on things, but siz hundy is alot to write a check for to see results in a year.  so as i was doing the math in my head the whole time, running my monthly income against my averages for all elements necessary to live (rent, car paymt, cell phone, electric, cable, gas, pilates, the necessities), the nice lady talked.  she told me everything i could ever want to know about the product and the process.  it was great.  but the whole time i was crunching numbers, half listening, and fretting that i wasn’t going to be able to make it work.  not this year anyway.  then i remembered that i’m due for a raise/cost of living increase/whatever, more money.  right about the time i realized i might have to put it off for 6 months i heard it…

“and if you’re dilligent and do everything you’re supposed to with your trays we throw in a gift of whitening at the end!”

SOLD!  that’s alli needed to hear.  their whitening treatments start at like $400 bucks!  and while i know i’d never shell out the money i’m so curious.  so that’s it.  i’m doing it.  especially when we were talking about it later and i let it slip that i was hoping to be having a wedding next year.  the dr. and the assistant got so excited and the dr. said “put that in her chart!” and then said that even if i’m not finished with the process by then she’ll do the whitening in time for a wedding.  (now i know that makes me kinda sound like a crazy person but honestly hoping to be married in teh near future is definitely a factor in not waiting any longer to do this.   it also kinda makes me look like an ass because if i don’t end up getting engaged, well, it’s in my chart)

i can’t wait to start… hopefully next month.  which means i have to seriously cut back on… well, EVERYTHING!  i’m not sure that i can afford to take pilates while i’m straightening my teeth.  maybe i’ll just have to be stronger willed and do it at home.  either way i think that finally getting my teeth straight will be such a wonderful thing!  like i said, it’s not cheap, but i think it’s worth it.  it’s something i’ve wanted since i was little.  but my family could never afford it.  and hopefully with my pay increase coming it’ll be even easier. 

i’m just going to wait a few weeks to really think it over.  because the other thing that makes me sweat about making this commitment?  if i’m spending all this money to straighten (and whiten) my teeth before my imaginary wedding, where am i gonna get any money for a n imaginary wedding?  because heaven knows my mom isn’t paying for it.  i guess i’ll worry about that one when it’s actually an issue : )

 

  

~ today i learned… the parachute was invented by DiVinci in 1515 ~

over dinner

our trip to Ocean City was good.  for the most part.  but i did what i always do… or what i do lately anyway. 

when i woke up saturday morning i just laid there, staring, trying to sort out my feelings.  you see i’d just woken out of a dream where M had proposed to me.  this had never happened before.  as much as i’ve daydreamed about it, i’ve never actually had a real-sleeping-vivid-feels-so-real-like-it’s-not-a-dream-kinda-dream.  and yet in the dream i couldn’t even be happy for the event.  i was ecstatic for a moment, until i looked at the ring.  i was upset because it wasn’t anything like what i wanted (on top of the fact that the diamond was bent… wtf?).  and i actually (in the dream still, stay with me) pouted to M because i’ve picked out so many rings and this just wasn’t my style.  in his defense he did quickly remedy the situation by calling over the people that were waiting in the wings just in case.  so anyway, when i woke up i ran through a circuit of emotions as i tried to come to terms with starting the day.  at first i was upset because i was awake now and in this life i was not engaged.  then i started to become nervous because if i couldn’t be happy about being engaged in my own dream, is it really what i want?  as i moved past that feeling i started to get excited.  like i said, i’ve never had this dream.  so it had to mean something, right?   i thought back and M had made some comments about things before this trip and i put it all together in my head.  i just had a feeling that this it.  this was the day.  so i got up and got ready for the beach, bringing make-up because you never know when you’re going to need to look nice (maybe for some pictures of the happy couple?).

we went about our day.  enjoying the beach.  the boardwalk.  pina coladas at the pool bar.  a (bad for me) round of putt-putt.  and me reading into every movement he made.  why go on this ride first, was he trying to set a moment up?  did he have something in mind?  as the day passed i kept reworking it in my head.  how he was going to do it now that we’d passed that last moment where he could have squeezed it in?  we finally went back to the hotel to take a nap before the evening.  when we woke up he suggested going to a nice dinner at a nice restaurant.  i got very excited.  this had to be it, why else would he want to dress up?  so i put myself together nicely.  at one point he ran out to the car and came back to tell me he’d received some recommendations from the guy at the front desk.  in my head i could hear him asking the guy “i’m looking for a really romantic place to pop the question, any suggestions?”.  he came back with the recommendation of the bar next door.  i knew it was more of a beach bar but said “whatever you want to do” anyway.  once we parked i began to get sad.  the reality that he really wasn’t trying to set anything up at all began to sink in.  he just wanted to have dinner.  as we waited and grabbed drinks at the bar i saw tables out on the sand where you could be seated.  i started to gather up my hope and just hold on for a bit.  with the sun setting over the bay in about 30 minutes, sitting out there would be absolutely gorgeous.  as i sipped my drink i looked at him and i felt my heart begin sinking.  just looking at him i knew i was wrong.   he wasn’t planning anything.  as they seated us at an “on beach” table i just stared and read his face.  it wasn’t going to happen… and i knew it.  i’d been setting myself up all day for the disappointment.  and just then, as i was choking back the hurt i’d caused myself, the entire restaurant applauded and cheered.  i looked up to see the couple, all of 21, who’d just gotten engaged right then.  i burst into tears.  i was sobbing.  i couldn’t control it.  i’ve been looking forward to this moment for over 2 years and for whatever reason i really thought it was going to be then.  i have no good reason why other than i had a dream.  and to watch someone else get what i just realized i wasn’t getting was awful.  it was painful even.  i sucked it up after a while and we went back to the hotel.  after we turned the lights out i cried some more.  it was a very hard day for me.  i’ve never felt that close to happiness and so far away all within an instant.  i never want to feel that again.

and while i think M is worth waiting for i just worry whether i can do it.  i don’t want to go through that again.  but i want to keep my hopes up.  because if i give up on us ever wanting the same thing, then why would i still want to be in the relationship?  i’m just trying to hold out.  when i really stop and think rationally about it, like on my drive in to work this morning, i am willing to wait much longer than i’ve implied.  and the odds are i will.  but i’m a girl, so i’m not always rational.  and when i get into those thoughts, those feelings, i get so upset and just want to pull the plug already because i don’t like the feelings that come with the let down.  so for now i’ll keep waiting and he’ll keep procrastinating.  it’s our thing.

without the shadow of that one day the trip was good.  we had fun.  i’m tan(ner) and i have a bucket of fisher’s caramel corn sitting next to me which makes any day good.  and i got to see my family.  something i don’t get to do but every year or so when there’s a funeral to attend.  i got to visit my dad, which was helpful.  and M had “the best crabcakes ever” which made me happy.  we also went on this ride called the zipper.  i was hesitant because it looked dull and i think i’ve seen it at carnivals before so how much fun could it be?  well, it was AWESOME!  if you run into this ride at your local carnival i highly recommend it.  i laughed and screamed the entire time… it was a blast! 

did anyone else have a tumultuous holiday weekend?

  

  

~ today i learned… John Lennon had a cat named Elvis~

trippin’

i’m still thinking about what relatively local trip to take with M.  yes, we went to DC a few weeks back but that was for the cherry blossom festival, and while it was nice it was also kind of a bust thanks to mother nature.  so i’ve been thinking about taking a warm trip somewhere.  M and i have usually summered with a couple, we rent a place and spend a week soaking up sun, drinking, and just relaxing.  but they just had a baby.  and while i knew we hadn’t made plans for this summer, and while i refused to set up a formal trip with M to some exocit locale, when M got a call from this couple yesterday and told me they were on vacation in FL i was kind miffed.  maybe they told M they were going on vacation without us, but if they did, he hadn’t told me.  so the first i really heard about us not doing a summer trip with them is that they’re already on it.  i’m not a fan of that.  i like notice.  if something is implied i like to know when things change and it’s not going to happen.  i know i’m being ridiculous because i didn’t really expect them to go on vacation with us now that they have a family of their own, and it’s not like we had solid plans that they just disregarded, but i like to be kept in the loop with things that involve me. 

so i started looking at little trips for M and i to take.  after spending one day at the beach this weekend, i’ve got suntan fever.  i need a beach weekend.  i know that my finances will not allow for a fancy vacation this year, but maybe a couple small ones will suffice?

i was thinking of doing Ocean City MD.  we spent alot of summers there as kids since my family is from maryland.  i have great memories of the place but every time i go i’m disappointed at how run down it’s become.  while i don’t expect that it’s gotten any better it still has sand and sun.  and i’m afraid there isn’t much that compares to thrasher’s french fries or fisher’s caramel corn.  i’m starting to salivate just thinking about them.  plus going there would give us a chance to swing through the town my relatives all live in and visit my father’s grave.  so that’s my first choice.

the second choice is Atlantic City in jersey.  we both love gambling and i’ve never been there.  though i’ve already pre-judged it and decided it’s dingy and dirty and for the elderly and/or trampy.  but we’ll see.  i started looking at hotels and found this one, Come Wright Inn Bed & Breakfast. that’s just wrong.  so wrong.  makes me not want to go to AC at all if they let people get away with this crass mess.  also, if we go to jersey i want to hit six flags and rutt’s hutt (i dream of this place, i love hot dogs!)… but each of these is even further from AC than i wanted.  which means we’ll need to add more days or have a crazy packed trip… and i want to relax.  maybe we’ll just have to settle for six flags NE when i go to CT. 

i dunno.  i’m just ready for a real vacation.  i’d love to go somewhere fancy, but i think i’d like to try a few small trips here and there instead.  spread it out a little.  it’s probably just the nice weather.  because for the past few months i’ve been anti-trip-planning for fear that i’ll stay with M even longer than i should simply because we have a future trip.  i don’t put it past myself, i’ll use any excuse i can conjure up to stay with him longer.  but i also shouldn’t punish myself just because he’s got issues.  so i figure what the hey?  let’s just put some plans down.  they don’t have to be months down the road, but a few weeks is cool.

so i’m taking recommendations on hotels in AC or OC that are under $250 a night (trying to make these fun cheap trips).  anyone got any suggestions?

  

  

~ today i learned… ninja warrior didn’t crown it’s first champion until the 4th season ~

monday schmonday

the trip with L here was good.  actually, it was great.  it’s always so wonderful to spend time with her.  we really have so much in common.  we had alot to do while we were here.  we went out to dinner and drinks with M and some of his friends on friday night.  ummm… yah…. i woke up at 4am to puke.  good times.  i’m sad she had to go back though.  but even still, after spending 24hrs a day with anyone you’re kinda ready for a break after a few days.  and i’ll see her in june when i come up to visit.

the weather here was perfect while she was here, 80’s from the time she got off the plane until it started raining yesterday morning (which is not supposed to stop until wednesday… boy do i love my wellies!).  we spent time outside and had a good time.  during one of our excursions we decided to turn on the AC but when we did, it was clear that it wasn’t working.  i immediately called the shop and made an appointment for today.  i just dropped my car off this morning and i got a call that it’s already ready to go.  so that’s good.  the only thing that sucks is that the new guy there doesn’t call me before he does any work.  so now i have a couple hundred bucks to pay when i get there.  not that i wouldn’t have had it fixed but i like to feel like i have some say.

anyway, i do have one question today… when did facebook become an acceptable replacement for conversation?   S and i both recently reconnected with a girl we were good friends with in HS.  her birthday was last week.  she had no reason to believe i would send her anything, but i did.  and all i got was a facebook message saying thanks.  seriously?  that’s crap.  i’m kinda ticked about it because i think that’s rude.  i would never just send someone a thank you over facebook or anything else, i wouldn’t even just send an email.  you call people if you appreciate them.  i personally either call or write a thank you card, but i know the latter is way beyond most people’s level of effort today.

can someone explain to me when an internet networking message began replacing a sincere conversation?  and does this make me sound like an old lady??

 

  

~ today i learned… it’s believed that the term “whistle while you work” stems from masters of a house having their kitchen slaves whistle so as to ensure that they were not eating their food.~